


Body Cover

by alyjude_sideburns



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-13
Updated: 2014-01-13
Packaged: 2018-01-08 12:25:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1132630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alyjude_sideburns/pseuds/alyjude_sideburns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Rodney does a reckless thing - John gets angry and bus clues are discovered</p><p>Originally published in 2007</p>
            </blockquote>





	Body Cover

 

 

**"Get off me NOW!"**

Rodney thought he heard something, but his ears were ringing and really, his heart was beating so hard that even if not for the ringing ears, he doubted he'd hear anything clearly anyway. The ground bucked beneath him and his first thought was an earthquake, which seemed overkill to him. After all, hadn't they just been attacked by a couple of Wraith? Yes. So to have an earthquake on top of that? Totally unfair.

**"Rodney, get OFF!"**

There was that sound again...and the bucking, but this time it was enough to force him to roll over - and consequently off a strangely warm, comfortable and semi-soft ground - and onto his side. He debated opening his eyes; debated because he really didn't want to see a Wraith standing over him -- although -- if they were having earthquakes, maybe the Wraith took off, maybe it thought it was a new kind of weapon and was, even now, winging its way to its nice warm hive. But no, that wasn't possible because Ronon and John had blown the ship up. Of course, there was still the one Wraith that hadn't made it to the ship....

Rodney decided to face his fate - and opened his eyes.

Aah, green grass and - oh, shit - face down in the grass; a Wraith.

"Oh, **SHIT**!" he yelled, because it seemed, since he'd already said it mentally, to be the right thing to do, to say it out loud, especially since maybe his team...and maybe someone... He sat straight up and looked frantically around for his team - for Sheppard, the idiot with the death wish....

Teyla's face suddenly came into view as she knelt beside him and, thankfully, put herself between him and the body. Her lips were moving and he heard...rumblings, but that was it. What the hell was going on?

***

Teyla realized that while Colonel Sheppard had risen quickly to his feet once Rodney had rolled off him, McKay was still on the ground and looking very confused. She knelt beside him and asked, "Rodney, are you injured?"

Blinking at her, he continued to look dazed as he asked, "What?"

"He was closest to the blast that hit the tree," Ronon said. "I think his hearing--"

"Let's see if the asshole can hear this," John said as he moved around Ronon and closer to Rodney again. Planting his feet on either side of Rodney's out-stretched legs, he said, "If you **EVER** do **ANYTHING** like that again, you'll be off this team so fast, you'll have forgotten you were ever a part of it. You understand me, _Doctor_ McKay?"

Rodney frowned, turned to Teyla and said, "He looks pretty angry, which considering there's a dead Wraith versus a dead team member, that seems rather out of place." With that, he stuck a finger in his ear, wiggled it around, stretched his jaw wide open and felt a kind of popping sound.

"Colonel, if Rodney had not pushed you out of the way, you would now be dead," Teyla gently chastised.

"Exactly!" John yelled. "How dare he take such a risk! That is **not** his job and it was **STUPID**!"

***

"Exactly!" John yelled. "How dare he take such a risk! That is **not** his job and it was **STUPID**!"

Okay, Rodney definitely heard that. His hearing appeared to be returning and, judging by the flush of anger on Sheppard's face, he was about to wish it wasn't.

John bent at the waist, thus bringing his face within inches of Rodney's. "Rodney, can you hear me?"

"That depends," Rodney said sensibly. He was no fool.

"I think he can hear you just fine now," Ronon said, trying not to grin.

"I'm so glad because I have something very important to say."

"Thank you?" Rodney suggested, remembering now that he'd thrown himself at Sheppard when the Wraith had fired at him.

"No, McKay, a thank you isn't even close, but this is: Do not, I **repeat** , do not, under any circumstances, ever throw yourself in front of me, on top of me, or at me again. Is that understood?"

Rodney glanced over at Teyla, and because he could always count on her for common sense, asked, "Did I miss something about being on a team? Something about protecting each other - especially the fearless leader who tends to have moments of incredible stupidity that usually result in his doing something guaranteed to get him killed?"

"No, you have not missed that important component. I believe team members should protect each other."

Shooting John a smug and triumphant look, Rodney crossed his arms over his chest, ignored the strange pulling pain, and stuck out his chin; one that some would think a bit weak but that he rather vainly thought to be his best feature.

"Teyla," John said, his voice deceptively easy-going. "What are the rules regarding team members with exceptionally high IQ's - even when not as high as oh, say, Colonel Samantha Carter's - pulling foolish stunts like throwing themselves in the path of a Wraith weapon?"

"If you're going to go by IQ's, Colonel," Rodney said, "then I did precisely the correct thing since I'm very aware of your IQ and, while not in my stratosphere, still counts as extremely high. And for your information, mine is exactly three points above Samantha's."

"Oh, so it's Samantha now, is it? Why not Sam? Why not--"

"Colonel, is it not possible that more Wraith may arrive? We have destroyed one of their ships...."

Teyla let her voice trail off, feeling no need to go any further.

Giving Rodney another killer look, John said, "All right, let's get the hell out of here, and Ronon, nice shooting, by the way."

With that, he started to walk away. Ronon shrugged and followed. Teyla, eyes full of pity, rose to her feet and held out her hand for Rodney. He shook it off, got up on his own...and was very grateful that Teyla had turned away thus missing his wince of pain.

Normally, he'd have been more than happy to let anyone who'd listen know that he was hurt, but not this time. He'd be damned if he'd give Sheppard the satisfaction. No, sir.

He didn't know _why_ he hurt, nor was he going to look or try to figure it out. He'd wait until they were home where he could let Carson take care of it. _Then_ he'd complain and whine.

***

His plan backfired but it wasn't his fault. No, the fault lay with Sheppard, who was being an asshole, as usual. After safely reaching the puddle jumper and, once Teyla and Ronon had entered, John stepped aside in order to allow Rodney to precede him. Which might have been rather nice, in a condescending way, but the expression on the man's face, the haughty, slightly evil look ruined the gesture.

"After you, _Doctor_ ," he said snidely while making a sweeping movement with his arm.

"Oh, shut up," Rodney snapped back as he started up the ramp.

**"Holy shit!"**

The exclamation was loud enough, and unpredictable enough, to cause Rodney to stumble and almost fall, but then John was there, his hand on Rodney's arm, the haughty, evil expression gone. And, unless Rodney was going crazy, John looked...he looked kind of afraid, actually, which in turn, sent tendrils of fear climbing up Rodney's spine.

"Colonel, what is it?" Teyla asked, clearly worried.

"Jesus, he has...Rodney has...out of his back and it's just sticking out...."

Rodney then did a very stupid thing. He reached back to find out what the hell John was talking about and his fingers came into contact with something that definitely shouldn't be there, and of course it hurt like hell, so he thought passing out might be a good idea.

He was ultimately proven correct.

***

"...so you're saying that when Rodney threw himself at Colonel Sheppard, the blast from the Wraith's weapon hit the tree and a splinter lodged itself in his back?"

Rodney heard Elizabeth's words but didn't immediately connect them with him, even though he'd heard his name. He was feeling warm and fuzzy, the kind that usually came with some of Carson's better drugs and, with a start, realized that meant he was in Sick Bay.

"Rodney, can you hear me?"

Carson's voice this time - always a safe one to listen to. Rodney opened his eyes.

"There you are, how are you feeling?"

Rodney wet his lips and croaked out, "Don't know. Tell me what happened and if I'm going to die and I'll tell you how I feel."

"Now that's the Rodney we all know and love," John said. "And you're going to live, but only because Elizabeth, Teyla, Ronon and Carson convinced me that killing you would be a mistake. Zelenka took a more neutral stance, but if I'd really tried, I could have brought him over to my side."

"Ever the struggling comedian," Rodney said. "You really should give up the notion of taking it up as a second career. You'll fail miserably."

"I'd say he's going to be just fine," John said as he rocked back on his heels while managing to look supremely pleased.

"He is," Carson agreed. "But he was very lucky. An inch to the left, a bit deeper, and the story would have been extremely different."

Even though the words were tempered by Carson's soft brogue, everyone got the idea.

"But since it wasn't an inch to the left or deeper, I'll release him in the morning. The stitches will keep him from any future missions for approximately two weeks, but then he'll be as good as new."

That seemed to satisfy everyone and yes, Rodney had to admit, it certainly satisfied him, so he yawned, decided not to whine about pain or being hurt again, or any of his usual crap and just go to sleep instead. Which he did.

***

Okay, this was not working. No matter what position he tried, his stitches pulled, twisted and were just a plain nuisance. He shifted his laptop onto his right thigh in order to pull his left shoulder away from the pillows that were helping to prop him up and experienced a modicum of relief. But he knew it would be short-lived.

He sighed and went back to the work Radek had so helpfully provided in order to keep Rodney from going insane when, in reality, he'd been quite happy in his quarters, sleeping and reading and making like a vegetable - for a change. But damn it, now that the work was here, he could no more ignore it than he could the damn stitches in his back. Thank God they'd be coming out tomorrow.

There was a sudden whooshing sound and his door slid open to reveal Sheppard.

"What, we no longer request permission to enter someone's quarters, Colonel?" Rodney asked, the acid fairly dripping from his tongue.

"I've never asked permission and you know it. I always barge in."

"True, your rudeness is consistent if nothing else. So why the barge this time?"

"Your stitches come out tomorrow, which means you'll be cleared for duty again and I felt that now would be a good time to talk and clarify a few things - like your future duties on my team."

Rodney narrowed his eyes, moved the laptop (no way did he want to throw it when he got angry enough at Sheppard to throw things - which was imminent) and crossed his arms (another safety measure). "Oh, really? And what makes you think I'm not fully cognizant of my job responsibilities? That I don't know damn well my job is to continually save your sorry ass in seconds, even when you're yelling in my ear to 'hurry up, Rodney'?"

"You left off the whining and constant complaining."

"They don't pertain to my duties on your precious team because they're what I do no matter where I am."

"Point taken. However, saving my sorry ass is **not** ," he waggled a finger at Rodney, "in your job description and you will promise right here and now to never do it again because that kind of noble action is not you and I've always counted on you as the one person not to do anything foolish and--"

"Noble?" Rodney asked sarcastically.

"Exactly. Your sense of self-preservation has always been one of your more endearing qualities and I'd hate to see it fall by the wayside now. It's bad enough I have to worry about Teyla and Ronon, I sure as hell don't want to start worrying about you too. So if you'll just promise not--"

"Endearing? Did you just say 'endearing'?"

"Rodney, just promise not to do anything that foolish again and we're cool."

"So cowardice is an endearing quality to you. Nice to know," Rodney grumbled.

"I never used the word coward. I said, 'self-preservation' and that's entirely different. I would never call you a coward. A whiner, definitely. A pain in the ass? Oh, yeah. But a coward? Not hardly. But two weeks ago, you crossed a line that I thought was safe and I'm simply asking you to never cross it again."

"I'd like to be accomodating, and believe me, no one is more surprised than I am that I can't. But the problem is, I'm sick and tired of your cavalier attitude toward your own death. You're in command - militarily speaking - of this expedition, and you're our team leader. You owe us your continued breathing. So no, the next time you do something stupid like putting yourself at risk, and I can stop it, I will."

For an entire minute, John was speechless. He stood next to Rodney's bed, his mouth opening and closing, his eyes blinking endlessly. But eventually, he seemed to regain control, scratched the top of his head (which always reminded Rodney of Stan Laurel) and said, "We seem to be at an impasse."

"I disagree--"

"There's news."

"We are not at an impasse - you simply need to make a promise, which will be followed by a similar promise from me."

"Rodney, while normally I'd never interfere with one of your equations, I'm afraid this one is so skewered that I have to point out the problems." He held up his hand, tweaked his index finger with his other hand and said, "Number one, I'm a soldier. It's my job to risk my life over others. Especially when, technically, the other three members of my team are all civilians and one of them is a brain trust we can't afford to lose. It's my job, Rodney, not yours. Yours is to stay alive and save all our lives on a fairly regular basis, whether I yell in your ear or not."

Now it was Rodney's turn to be speechless, but he was very careful not to open and close his mouth like some kind of stupid carp. John could pull it off because, well, he was gorgeous, but Rodney would just look dumb.

"I see my words have penetrated and you understand. So I take it we have a deal?"

Rodney reached out with his left hand and shifted his laptop back to the middle of his lap. This allowed him to accomplish two things: one, hide the boner he was suddenly sporting because John was gorgeous and Rodney was remembering how it felt to lie on top of him, and two, he could hide at least two of his fingers beneath the laptop, thus crossing them when he nodded and said, "I can see your position, Colonel, and yes, we have a deal."

Damn, he sure wished he hadn't used the word...position. So many came to mind. And here he'd thought he'd finally managed to control his...what...his infatuation? with John Sheppard.

John's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "You're crossing your fingers, aren't you, McKay?"

"What? Me? Of course not. I'm above such childish tricks."

"Rodney, you're the biggest child I know. Now show me both hands and then say it again."

Careful not to dislodge the laptop from what was becoming a truly impressive boner, if he did say so himself, he held up both hands. "It's a deal, and the only child in Atlantis is you."

Satisfied, John said, "If I am, then that explains our friendship, doesn't it?"

Okay, that surprised him. One hell of a surprise. "Are we...are we friends?"

"I like to think so. Best friends. That's why I was so mad. You could have been killed, Rodney. And I don't think...I've lost too many under my command, I don't think...I don't think...."

John shifted uncomfortably and turned awkwardly to the left and it hit Rodney that perhaps impressive boners weren't restricted to brain trusts who hadn't gotten any in months and months...and damn it, months.

"You know," he said thoughtfully, while trying not to look at what John was trying so hard to hide, "I think I remember you're saying something  
about how I was to never throw myself on you or at you...and I'm thinking that's a promise I have no intention of keeping."

Wondering where the courage to speak up was coming from, but glad for it, Rodney, the man who usually blustered and stammered around women, found himself suddenly confident in the face of John's discomfort. Maybe it was the fact that he had the upper...hand. For once.

"Anyway," he went on, "as soon as the stitches come out, I intend on throwing myself at you at the earliest possible moment, which I hope will result in my throwing myself on you."

When John didn't answer, when he actually tried to look casual while hiding his 'interest', Rodney added with a waggle of eyebrows, "Want to compare?"

"Are you nuts?" John finally managed to croak out.

"Yes, but that's a given. I'm a genius and we're all nuts. But that has nothing to do with throwing myself at you. Are you going to catch me or let me fall flat on my face?"

John seemed to suddenly relax, as if accepting the inevitable. "You could hurt yourself if you fell."

"I could. Stitches could come out. I could bleed all over the floor."

"Can't have that."

"Impractical."

"At the very least."

"So you'll catch me?"

"I will."

"Consider myself thrown."

John gave Rodney his most rakish grin. "Consider yourself caught."

 

-30-


End file.
